Playing hide and seek with John on the internet. During work, of course. We were so not being fair with whatever privacy the internet offers. Almost naked in our stupid little “who am I” game, although we knew each other for two years now (yeah, damn, I’m getting old). However, never had such fun at work before.
And I discover my questions in his characters, I see myself trying to convince him that I am not who he thinks I am, no reason, just for fun. Play hard to discover, I’d say. Hard to discover even for myself.
Sex and the City… again
He’s Carrie and I’m Miranda. He is indeed Carrie, like everyone else can be Carrie at some point in life. He is “a curly complicated gal” or whatever the masculine word is for that, contrasting with a straight hair simple girl, a whoever in the mind of the TV show obsessed person. I am just Miranda, which is great somehow but soooo disappointing for my wishful thinking. And then I get another try and I am still Miranda, and then at another test I score as Carrie and oh, my god, I need to buy new shoes kind of feeling. Nobody wants to be Charlotte, we didn’t even mention her in our silly chat. But John is so Carrie, so moody and unpredictable in a predictable manner after six seasons (or should I say two years?). And I am scared that I might be Miranda and then I wish I was Miranda but I don’t think I am… However, I would never be with a guy who’s out of my league, I could always have a baby without planning it, I would have a maid if I would afford it and so on. But I still want to be Carrie! And not because she’s the main character or something, but because she goes to the movies by herself, because she dates the city and has impracticable shoes (which I don’t usually like, but shopping is a state of mind).
Grey’s Anatomy
I am 100% compatible with Grey, Cristina and Burke. I have to pick one more time who I want to be, ‘cause the last three statements were soo predictable. Of course I pick Grey, at least she is human, although my sister says I am so Cristina at times. John wants to be Addison, but he’s Grey. Of course he’s Grey. He’s always who I want to be, or at least I perceived him as having the life that would fit me, with no unnecessary complications and all the time he needs to do whatever he wants to. I might be wrong though. And I remember him stressed out because of work, I remember that on Sunday he was in his office until late in the afternoon (not working, but still), I remember whatever makes me not envy him. I am still Grey if I want to, all sweet and somehow universal, so good and nice but so indecisive and vulnerable at times. I can be Cristina, or, should I say, I am Cristina whenever I am the “bad” Grey (as in vulnerable and weak and suicidal). I am not Burke, although I would run away from my own wedding, out of nowhere (there is no such thing as out of nowhere, there is always a somewhere there…anyhow). And I came home and took another test and it turns out I am Callie. A little bit socially retarded, but still ok, even if I have to cry a little to get what I want. Noooo, I am so not Callie. Stupid tests… I really got mad at this result!
Desperate housewife?
I only had one test, some time ago and I was Lynette. Given the Miranda result from SATC I was like, ok, I am the smart-stupid lady who ends up with things she never wanted. But John is Gaby. And then I am sooo satisfied with my Lynette. He is a little bit sluttish, a little bit amoral, but definitely passionate and beautiful, somehow strong and powerful. He says he’s Bree (geez, I hate her, he cannot be Bree) and I say he’s Susan, following the logic of being Carrie and Grey, and then, of course, he must be Susan. And then we played characters and I didn’t know who he was anymore. And he was everyone as I was just me. No characters to define me, because I then felt numb and comfortable with not being a TV show character. He was every TV character I’ve ever “met” because he knew how to make himself Gaby or Carrie or Samantha or Bree, or Addison or Meredith to me at that time. And my only question is why wouldn’t a guy want to be McDreamy, or McSteamy or Mike Delfino, or Big? I would even go for that hot guy Samantha ended up with. So, the most fun TV show characters conversation I ever had. Too bad we had to stop the thing. I was laughing at my computer like hell when an add pop up from a news website, saying “I am not paying you to surf the internet!”. that was so fun!
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